March 22, 2011
My teeth hurt a lot, so I'm sticking to softer foods. It's kind of a limiting diet and it's getting old real fast. I'm popping ibuprofen like it's candy, but it doesn't seem to make a difference. I am getting into my labs a lot, so I am glad for that source of motivation.
Too Dramatic- aka what I have been the past few days
It's true, I have been way too melodramatic the past four or five days. The littlest things make me feel like my world is crashing down. I know it's a problem because, well, I've noticed it as a problem. I know that there are things that can get me down, and I am my worst critic. I think pretty much everyone can relate, but there are so many more important things. So what my hair is incredibly short, at least I have/ had hair to chop off. And braces, I'm done pity partying with those things. They were self-inflicted because I didn't like the gap in my teeth, at least I have parents that are willing to pay for them.
I literally don't have to worry about anything. I am so undeniably blessed, but all I can focus on is the things that are going wrong or that I am not fond of. I'm too dramatic. Here I go again, turning over that leaf again. Good thing there are lots of forests, I have a feeling I'll be turning over a lot more before I'm through.
Thanks for that. Adios theatrics!
Psalm 12
I am not sure if what I am about to write is necessarily what David had in mind when he was writing this, but this is what I am taking. People choose their words carefully, and that isn't a bad thing at all. But when words are calculated, that's where I feel the sin can creep up. I am so guilty of this!
Sarcasm, wit, just trying to sound intelligent. How many times have my words gotten me into trouble. And even more, how many times have I rethought sentences to make myself look like I am a cut above the rest, verbally? And how many times have You warned against it? I use words to hide behind, words to make myself feel better, use words to make people feel worse, use them in an effort to make someone laugh. I wonder the percentage of the time my words are used for edifying and encouraging. I don't want to be saved by my wit or by my words, the words that did that were "it is finished" and it is. Thank You.
His words, on the other hand, is "flawless." And even better than that His Word, saved us. Since the beginning the Word was there, and will be forever and ever.
Words are powerful things, sometimes even more powerful than we could ever imagine. We have the ability to uplift or tear down. To glorify ourselves, or to sing of His glory forever. What do my words say about me, what to they say about Him?
"18 The words of the reckless pierce like swords,
but the tongue of the wise brings healing.
19Truthful lips endure forever,
but a lying tongue lasts only a moment." Proverbs 12: 18-19
Too Dramatic
Tuesday, March 22, 2011
Monday, March 21, 2011
Laundry Room- The Avett Brothers
March 21, 2011
Laundry Room
The Avett Brothers are one of those bands that every song they make is great. I have three of their albums and each one is a wonderful compilation of songs. Their sounds is unique and their lyrics are fun. And this song in particular kind of shows where I feel I have been before.
"Last night I dreamt the whole night long
I awoke with a head full of songs
I spent the whole day
I wrote 'em down, but it's a shame
Tonight I'll burn the lyrics
'Cause every chorus was your name"
Trying to get that one person out of your head is hard to do. Taking it day by day makes it easier, though.
Psalm 11
This one ends great "Once we're standing tall, we can look Him straight in the eye" (The Message). He's the one that sets us right and He's the one who puts us in that position to be able to look at Him.
This Psalm is telling of God's character and I really enjoy the break from David. God is just, He loves, and He Is our strength. I can't think of a better way to write it than David did, and I just want to go back and reread it.
1IN THE Lord I take refuge [and put my trust]; how can you say to me, Flee like a bird to your mountain?
2For see, the wicked are bending the bow; they make ready their arrow upon the string, that they [furtively] in darkness may shoot at the upright in heart.
3If the foundations are destroyed, what can the [unyieldingly] righteous do, or what has He [the Righteous One] wrought or accomplished?
4The Lord is in His holy temple; the Lord's throne is in heaven. His eyes behold; His eyelids test and prove the children of men.
5The Lord tests and proves the [unyieldingly] righteous, but His soul abhors the wicked and him who loves violence.
6Upon the wicked He will rain quick burning coals or snares; fire, brimstone, and a [dreadful] scorching wind shall be the portion of their cup.
7For the Lord is [rigidly] righteous, He loves righteous deeds; the upright shall behold His face, or He beholds the upright. (Psalm 11 Amplified Bible)
Laundry Room
Laundry Room
The Avett Brothers are one of those bands that every song they make is great. I have three of their albums and each one is a wonderful compilation of songs. Their sounds is unique and their lyrics are fun. And this song in particular kind of shows where I feel I have been before.
"Last night I dreamt the whole night long
I awoke with a head full of songs
I spent the whole day
I wrote 'em down, but it's a shame
Tonight I'll burn the lyrics
'Cause every chorus was your name"
Trying to get that one person out of your head is hard to do. Taking it day by day makes it easier, though.
Psalm 11
This one ends great "Once we're standing tall, we can look Him straight in the eye" (The Message). He's the one that sets us right and He's the one who puts us in that position to be able to look at Him.
This Psalm is telling of God's character and I really enjoy the break from David. God is just, He loves, and He Is our strength. I can't think of a better way to write it than David did, and I just want to go back and reread it.
1IN THE Lord I take refuge [and put my trust]; how can you say to me, Flee like a bird to your mountain?
2For see, the wicked are bending the bow; they make ready their arrow upon the string, that they [furtively] in darkness may shoot at the upright in heart.
3If the foundations are destroyed, what can the [unyieldingly] righteous do, or what has He [the Righteous One] wrought or accomplished?
4The Lord is in His holy temple; the Lord's throne is in heaven. His eyes behold; His eyelids test and prove the children of men.
5The Lord tests and proves the [unyieldingly] righteous, but His soul abhors the wicked and him who loves violence.
6Upon the wicked He will rain quick burning coals or snares; fire, brimstone, and a [dreadful] scorching wind shall be the portion of their cup.
7For the Lord is [rigidly] righteous, He loves righteous deeds; the upright shall behold His face, or He beholds the upright. (Psalm 11 Amplified Bible)
Laundry Room
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Fed To Death- Say Anything
March 20, 2011
It's been a dang good day! I am adjusting to life one step closer to a 12 year old rather well, and tomorrow's the big day for braces, dude, I'm going to be single for a while. Anyway, it's been a really great day. I "Just Danced 2" for about two hours and I am sad to say that I am sore. I am planning on running every day this week. I am meeting with an advisor and hopefully hearing back from lab opportunities. It's going to be a great week. Thank You so much for that. Friends, family, and You all the time.
Fed To Death
Man, it took longer than I expected to put a Say Anything song up here, and this isn't even one of the ones I listen to the most. I don't know what it is about this song, but I just don't want it to end. I want it to be longer. It just sounds so cool.
Me and Max Bemis have had a wonderful relationship. We first met in tenth grade, we were introduced by one of my close friends of the time, and unfortunately only Maxy-poo and I still remain close. I have seen Say Anything live two glorious times, and I can't wait for the day that I get to see them again. They are probably my favorite band, and that's kind of surprising. And in a weird way, their music makes me want to be better, and see God working in really intense ways.
Max is Jewish, I think, but throughout the band's albums has gotten closer to forming his own relationship with the Big Guy. There's a song on their self-titled album that sounds like kind of has gotten to the point where he acknowledges God. When I listened to the song, I got really happy. In a strange way, I felt more connected to the music and to God. I may never actually meet Max, but given his background and seeing where he seems to be now, is amazing. Don't underestimate the power of God, especially since He's got a plan. And we all fit into it in random (to us) but perfect (to Him of course) ways.
Ok, this was more about the band than the song, but I do love them. And this song is great.
Numero Diez!
I really like the Message version of this Psalm. It's got some really intense parts in it. In the beginning David is asking God if He is avoiding him (thank goodness for capitalization or that sentence would have been so much more confusing). There have been so many times that I have thought that I have been abandoned by God. So many times where I find myself asking Him " Where the heck are you? Why am I feeling so alone?" I know that there are other things You have to worry about, but I'm hurting here, like people are out to get me and I can't see or hear or feel You anywhere. Am I supposed to do this on my own?
No. I'm not. You are there the whole time. You have a funny way of getting Your point across and I want to say thank You for that. How many times have I felt like I have been left to fend for myself, or felt insurmountable pain and thought You nowhere to be found, when the whole time You were there, keeping me safe. I've heard that You only allow as much as we can handle to happen, and I want to say I appreciate the confidence and the pain.
Pain is necessary for me to realize that I need You, and the way You do it is not in an overbearing "I am so much better than you" sort of way, but it's out of love. And You never let me fall past the point where You can catch me. I have been given a unique set of experiences that shape my love and relationship with You. And the most wonderful thing about each experience, is that I get to see You, parts of Your goodness, faithfulness, love. Thank You.
With the pain comes a promise, and this is something I want to hold on to and own. All of the things that I go through, all of the hard times here, are no match for how great Heaven will be. In Your time, everything will be redeemed. Everything will be set right. I want to thank You for this promise:
Psalm 10: 17-18
"The victim's faint pulse picks up;
the hearts of the hopeless pump red blood
as you put your ear to their lips.
Orphans get parents,
the homeless get homes.
The reign of terror is over,
the rule of the gang lords is ended."
Fed To Death
It's been a dang good day! I am adjusting to life one step closer to a 12 year old rather well, and tomorrow's the big day for braces, dude, I'm going to be single for a while. Anyway, it's been a really great day. I "Just Danced 2" for about two hours and I am sad to say that I am sore. I am planning on running every day this week. I am meeting with an advisor and hopefully hearing back from lab opportunities. It's going to be a great week. Thank You so much for that. Friends, family, and You all the time.
Fed To Death
Man, it took longer than I expected to put a Say Anything song up here, and this isn't even one of the ones I listen to the most. I don't know what it is about this song, but I just don't want it to end. I want it to be longer. It just sounds so cool.
Me and Max Bemis have had a wonderful relationship. We first met in tenth grade, we were introduced by one of my close friends of the time, and unfortunately only Maxy-poo and I still remain close. I have seen Say Anything live two glorious times, and I can't wait for the day that I get to see them again. They are probably my favorite band, and that's kind of surprising. And in a weird way, their music makes me want to be better, and see God working in really intense ways.
Max is Jewish, I think, but throughout the band's albums has gotten closer to forming his own relationship with the Big Guy. There's a song on their self-titled album that sounds like kind of has gotten to the point where he acknowledges God. When I listened to the song, I got really happy. In a strange way, I felt more connected to the music and to God. I may never actually meet Max, but given his background and seeing where he seems to be now, is amazing. Don't underestimate the power of God, especially since He's got a plan. And we all fit into it in random (to us) but perfect (to Him of course) ways.
Ok, this was more about the band than the song, but I do love them. And this song is great.
Numero Diez!
I really like the Message version of this Psalm. It's got some really intense parts in it. In the beginning David is asking God if He is avoiding him (thank goodness for capitalization or that sentence would have been so much more confusing). There have been so many times that I have thought that I have been abandoned by God. So many times where I find myself asking Him " Where the heck are you? Why am I feeling so alone?" I know that there are other things You have to worry about, but I'm hurting here, like people are out to get me and I can't see or hear or feel You anywhere. Am I supposed to do this on my own?
No. I'm not. You are there the whole time. You have a funny way of getting Your point across and I want to say thank You for that. How many times have I felt like I have been left to fend for myself, or felt insurmountable pain and thought You nowhere to be found, when the whole time You were there, keeping me safe. I've heard that You only allow as much as we can handle to happen, and I want to say I appreciate the confidence and the pain.
Pain is necessary for me to realize that I need You, and the way You do it is not in an overbearing "I am so much better than you" sort of way, but it's out of love. And You never let me fall past the point where You can catch me. I have been given a unique set of experiences that shape my love and relationship with You. And the most wonderful thing about each experience, is that I get to see You, parts of Your goodness, faithfulness, love. Thank You.
With the pain comes a promise, and this is something I want to hold on to and own. All of the things that I go through, all of the hard times here, are no match for how great Heaven will be. In Your time, everything will be redeemed. Everything will be set right. I want to thank You for this promise:
Psalm 10: 17-18
"The victim's faint pulse picks up;
the hearts of the hopeless pump red blood
as you put your ear to their lips.
Orphans get parents,
the homeless get homes.
The reign of terror is over,
the rule of the gang lords is ended."
Fed To Death
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Cowboy Take Me Away- Dixie Chicks
March 19, 2011
These times, they are a changing. It was a beautiful day outside today, and I am so glad that spring is hitting Boone (as much as it can). Light sweaters, flip flops, and shorts are going to be all the rage in the up coming week. And where will I be? Sporting a new hair cut by chance or maybe kicking it way old school (middle school to be exact) with a top row of braces. It's going to be a week of adjusting. Adjusting to the loss of hair, addition of metal, and hopefully, an acquisition of some self-confidence. I mean I'm going to need to dig deep and still be o.k. looking like I belong in pre-algebra and not Bio II.
Here's to change.
The song: Cowboy Take Me Away
So many things are right about this song. The voices, the instruments, the lyrics. What girl doesn't want to be transported to a land far away with the guy she's supposed to be with forever? I know I do! I have thought a lot about what that would be like, I think a lot of girls and women do. It's hard not to, it's like we're wired that way. And I don't think it's wrong to want those things. But it's hard not focusing on finding them.
I have been single for about a year now, I mean I haven't been involved with anything serious. It's a weird adjustment, and even weirder how not weird it is. I find missing things that I wasn't sure I would miss, I guess stuff I took for granted when I had a boyfriend. I miss the companionship of the whole thing. Having someone to tell everything to, and who actually kind of wanted to know all of it. Having someone to hang out with pretty much all the time. Having someone to plan the day, week, forever with. I think that's one of the weirdest things, not being sure about the future. I'm not saying that I had it all figured out when I was dating someone, but there was one less piece of the puzzle I had to work out. He was just there and was going to be for as long as forever lasted. Making those plans were easy and certain. Giving that up, was like giving up my future. It's hard to plan all that and then realize none of it is going to happen that way, at least in any way you imagined.
I have heard all of the cliches, "There's someone for everyone" or "It'll happen when you least expect it." Does that mean I have to stop wanting it to happen? I have to be totally fine thinking I'm going to be golden by myself? Do I have to convince myself it won't work out for it to come to fruition? I don't want that! I understand there is a contentedness in Him people need, and He is my number one, that's most of the reason I am single. We weren't good for my relationship with God. I want and hope that I am focusing on God and building a great relationship with Him. But I do want someone to love me in a tangible way. Lord, I hope You have someone out there for me. And that he is looking just as hard as I am.
Psalm: Nueve
David starts out real strong with this one. Thank goodness, I was getting tired of hearing how bad he has it. He offers up praises of how great God is, he seems to be genuinely happy to talk to Him. This goes all the way until verse twelve and then he starts being David again.
It kills me how much I am like David. He can see the greatness and beauty of God for like a split second and then lose it to what's in front of him. He goes from saying how amazing the Lord is, to reminding God that he has all these enemies that are after him. Geez, God, I am sorry that I do this. I make every conversation we have about me and what's going on with me. "Hey God, You're great, wonderful, beautiful! I can see you everywhere and You are the reason that I have a chance to experience today. Speaking of me, do You see how terrible my life is? School is lame, I'm fat, I have no direction, and I'm lonely. Me, Me, Me." I'm sorry, for real. You give me so much more a reason to sing Your name than need be, yet I still find time to plug my problems.
I know that You want to hear about my life, and those things that I am going through are things you care about, but I want our talks to be more than just about what I am unhappy with or need help with. You pour out blessings everywhere and I want to thank You for all of the great things that You, and only You have given me. I know that You're always there, but do I thank You? I know that You love me, but do I verbalize it to You enough? I know it's not about what I do or say, but I do appreciate You. I do want to know about You too.
Help me to stop monopolizing our conversations, God teach me to listen and be with You instead of just talking all the dang time.
Exodus 14:14 "The Lord will fight for you, and you need only to be silent"
Cowboy Take Me Away
These times, they are a changing. It was a beautiful day outside today, and I am so glad that spring is hitting Boone (as much as it can). Light sweaters, flip flops, and shorts are going to be all the rage in the up coming week. And where will I be? Sporting a new hair cut by chance or maybe kicking it way old school (middle school to be exact) with a top row of braces. It's going to be a week of adjusting. Adjusting to the loss of hair, addition of metal, and hopefully, an acquisition of some self-confidence. I mean I'm going to need to dig deep and still be o.k. looking like I belong in pre-algebra and not Bio II.
Here's to change.
The song: Cowboy Take Me Away
So many things are right about this song. The voices, the instruments, the lyrics. What girl doesn't want to be transported to a land far away with the guy she's supposed to be with forever? I know I do! I have thought a lot about what that would be like, I think a lot of girls and women do. It's hard not to, it's like we're wired that way. And I don't think it's wrong to want those things. But it's hard not focusing on finding them.
I have been single for about a year now, I mean I haven't been involved with anything serious. It's a weird adjustment, and even weirder how not weird it is. I find missing things that I wasn't sure I would miss, I guess stuff I took for granted when I had a boyfriend. I miss the companionship of the whole thing. Having someone to tell everything to, and who actually kind of wanted to know all of it. Having someone to hang out with pretty much all the time. Having someone to plan the day, week, forever with. I think that's one of the weirdest things, not being sure about the future. I'm not saying that I had it all figured out when I was dating someone, but there was one less piece of the puzzle I had to work out. He was just there and was going to be for as long as forever lasted. Making those plans were easy and certain. Giving that up, was like giving up my future. It's hard to plan all that and then realize none of it is going to happen that way, at least in any way you imagined.
I have heard all of the cliches, "There's someone for everyone" or "It'll happen when you least expect it." Does that mean I have to stop wanting it to happen? I have to be totally fine thinking I'm going to be golden by myself? Do I have to convince myself it won't work out for it to come to fruition? I don't want that! I understand there is a contentedness in Him people need, and He is my number one, that's most of the reason I am single. We weren't good for my relationship with God. I want and hope that I am focusing on God and building a great relationship with Him. But I do want someone to love me in a tangible way. Lord, I hope You have someone out there for me. And that he is looking just as hard as I am.
Psalm: Nueve
David starts out real strong with this one. Thank goodness, I was getting tired of hearing how bad he has it. He offers up praises of how great God is, he seems to be genuinely happy to talk to Him. This goes all the way until verse twelve and then he starts being David again.
It kills me how much I am like David. He can see the greatness and beauty of God for like a split second and then lose it to what's in front of him. He goes from saying how amazing the Lord is, to reminding God that he has all these enemies that are after him. Geez, God, I am sorry that I do this. I make every conversation we have about me and what's going on with me. "Hey God, You're great, wonderful, beautiful! I can see you everywhere and You are the reason that I have a chance to experience today. Speaking of me, do You see how terrible my life is? School is lame, I'm fat, I have no direction, and I'm lonely. Me, Me, Me." I'm sorry, for real. You give me so much more a reason to sing Your name than need be, yet I still find time to plug my problems.
I know that You want to hear about my life, and those things that I am going through are things you care about, but I want our talks to be more than just about what I am unhappy with or need help with. You pour out blessings everywhere and I want to thank You for all of the great things that You, and only You have given me. I know that You're always there, but do I thank You? I know that You love me, but do I verbalize it to You enough? I know it's not about what I do or say, but I do appreciate You. I do want to know about You too.
Help me to stop monopolizing our conversations, God teach me to listen and be with You instead of just talking all the dang time.
Exodus 14:14 "The Lord will fight for you, and you need only to be silent"
Cowboy Take Me Away
Friday, March 18, 2011
The Gardener- The Tallest Man on Earth
March 18, 2011
It's officially been a week! The last two days have been a struggle, maybe it's because my motives for writing have clouded. I want this to be for me and Him. I want to have this be a chance to talk to Him and journal and just let it all out. I appreciate readers, but you're not the reason I am writing.
That being said, thanks God for the wonderful weather. I have realized more and more that I need to have confidence to make decisions. The smallest ones become the biggest chores. Do I want to cut my hair, what am I doing this summer, what am I doing next semester, what am I doing with my life. I think I want to cut my hair to do something completely different, get rid of nine or so inches of the past.
THE GARDENER
This was the first song that I listened to from The Tallest Man on Earth and I have to say it is still one of my favorites. I love his voice, the instruments, and the lyrics that don't make sense to me. As random as they seem to me, they all still fit so well. Just everything about how I feel when I listen to this song makes it wonderful. I have run to it so many times. I have driven around Ocala to it so many times. I have walked around outside to it so many times.
The song kind of makes me want to adventure. Go out and find a new place or look at the place I'm in a little differently. Sitting outside in some grass, sippin lemonade, barefoot. I think this is a picture that will be so artfully painted tomorrow. Great music, great weather, and awe for an even greater God.
Step outside and experience the Son.
Psalm Eight
Goodness, He has a way about Him. Doesn't He? This Psalm goes pretty well with how I commonly experience God's presence.
People have been asking me a lot lately, and it's completely understandable, why I decided to move to North Carolina. I have a couple of different answers, but a lot of the reason I moved is that Boone is so geographically different than Ocala or Orlando. I love Florida, please do not get me wrong. The beach is one of my favorite places on the planet, and when I am home, well I can't really describe the feeling. But Boone and North Carolina in general has so many ways to see His handiwork. Just take a look at the mountains and it puts how small you are in to perspective. I think seeing the sun go down behind a mountain is one of the prettiest things I have ever witnessed.
It doesn't just put my size to scale, but also it makes God seem unimaginably big. These mountains are huge, and they aren't even the most impressive ones that are on the face of the planet. A God that placed them on the map has to be at least big enough to pick them up and put them there. Those are giant hands!
"I look up at your macro-skies, dark and enormous,
your handmade sky-jewelry,
Moon and stars mounted in their settings.
Then I look at my micro-self and wonder,
Why do you bother with us?
Why take a second look our way?" (Psalm 8: 3-4)
Why take a second look our way? It's crazy to think the God that created this vast and various landscape took the time to make me as intricately has He did. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE! That's what He does with us. And He trusts us enough to put us in charge of it. We get the chance to wake up and experience the gifts He has given us with, the ones He entrusted us with. Those big ole hands that made the earth are holding us so tight.
I'll say it again: Step outside and experience the Son.
The Gardener
It's officially been a week! The last two days have been a struggle, maybe it's because my motives for writing have clouded. I want this to be for me and Him. I want to have this be a chance to talk to Him and journal and just let it all out. I appreciate readers, but you're not the reason I am writing.
That being said, thanks God for the wonderful weather. I have realized more and more that I need to have confidence to make decisions. The smallest ones become the biggest chores. Do I want to cut my hair, what am I doing this summer, what am I doing next semester, what am I doing with my life. I think I want to cut my hair to do something completely different, get rid of nine or so inches of the past.
THE GARDENER
This was the first song that I listened to from The Tallest Man on Earth and I have to say it is still one of my favorites. I love his voice, the instruments, and the lyrics that don't make sense to me. As random as they seem to me, they all still fit so well. Just everything about how I feel when I listen to this song makes it wonderful. I have run to it so many times. I have driven around Ocala to it so many times. I have walked around outside to it so many times.
The song kind of makes me want to adventure. Go out and find a new place or look at the place I'm in a little differently. Sitting outside in some grass, sippin lemonade, barefoot. I think this is a picture that will be so artfully painted tomorrow. Great music, great weather, and awe for an even greater God.
Step outside and experience the Son.
Psalm Eight
Goodness, He has a way about Him. Doesn't He? This Psalm goes pretty well with how I commonly experience God's presence.
People have been asking me a lot lately, and it's completely understandable, why I decided to move to North Carolina. I have a couple of different answers, but a lot of the reason I moved is that Boone is so geographically different than Ocala or Orlando. I love Florida, please do not get me wrong. The beach is one of my favorite places on the planet, and when I am home, well I can't really describe the feeling. But Boone and North Carolina in general has so many ways to see His handiwork. Just take a look at the mountains and it puts how small you are in to perspective. I think seeing the sun go down behind a mountain is one of the prettiest things I have ever witnessed.
It doesn't just put my size to scale, but also it makes God seem unimaginably big. These mountains are huge, and they aren't even the most impressive ones that are on the face of the planet. A God that placed them on the map has to be at least big enough to pick them up and put them there. Those are giant hands!
"I look up at your macro-skies, dark and enormous,
your handmade sky-jewelry,
Moon and stars mounted in their settings.
Then I look at my micro-self and wonder,
Why do you bother with us?
Why take a second look our way?" (Psalm 8: 3-4)
Why take a second look our way? It's crazy to think the God that created this vast and various landscape took the time to make me as intricately has He did. LOVE, LOVE, LOVE! That's what He does with us. And He trusts us enough to put us in charge of it. We get the chance to wake up and experience the gifts He has given us with, the ones He entrusted us with. Those big ole hands that made the earth are holding us so tight.
I'll say it again: Step outside and experience the Son.
The Gardener
Thursday, March 17, 2011
Vesuvius- Sufjuan Stevens
March 17, 2011
Happy St. Patty's Day! I feel like I have just been running off steam for the past couple days. A lot of that has to do with the fact that I haven't gotten too much sleep and that I have literally walked the metaphorical pants off Boone. I must have walked close to five miles yesterday and about three today, and all of that is on top of the exercise I have been doing. I'm pooped, and ready for Friday. To be completely honest, I am making myself write the entry for today out of obligation and guilt. Guilt that if I didn't do it today, I wouldn't have really spent any time in the Word. So, I hope that He and I still have a productive time. I need to focus.
A big volcano: Vesuvius
I have been kind of obsessed with this song for about two months, it already has thirty-eight iTunes plays, and that doesn't count the near five hundred CD plays it's had. Other than having an interesting name, Sufjuan (pronounced Su-fee-yawn) has an interesting style. It uses a lot of fabricated sounds, those being the ones that don't come from traditional instruments (look at me making up musical terms, and convincing myself the are true...I am so tried).
I have been staring at the lyrics for about twenty minutes, reading about what people think he actually says, and perusing the potential meanings of the song. Some say the actual volcano and some say it's about much, much more. It's about the "Fire of Fire." Fire, back in the day was one of the most powerful things and God is referred to as the Lord of Lords, so the fact that there might be a little more to the song that ash and lava isn't that silly. Especially since Sufjan is a fan of the Big Man. Even with the lyrics hashed out, it doesn't make a lot of sense. But there is a part that I can relate to.
There is a part in the song where he talks to himself in the third person, "Sufjuan follow the path...Sufjan follow your heart." There are two things that can be going on here. One is that he may be self motivating or two, it could be someone else talking to him. In one of the interpretations they think that Sufjan is struggling with "walking the straight and narrow." Living his life out as a Christian isn't going as smoothly as he'd hoped, and he's at a crossroads. To follow what he knows is right, or to follow what is easy. The reference of his name in the third person, could be the Holy Spirit motivating him to keep going. "You got it kid!" I think that may be it, because the lyrics go:
"In your breast
I carry the form
The heart of the Earth
And the weapons of warmth"
Happy St. Patty's Day! I feel like I have just been running off steam for the past couple days. A lot of that has to do with the fact that I haven't gotten too much sleep and that I have literally walked the metaphorical pants off Boone. I must have walked close to five miles yesterday and about three today, and all of that is on top of the exercise I have been doing. I'm pooped, and ready for Friday. To be completely honest, I am making myself write the entry for today out of obligation and guilt. Guilt that if I didn't do it today, I wouldn't have really spent any time in the Word. So, I hope that He and I still have a productive time. I need to focus.
A big volcano: Vesuvius
I have been kind of obsessed with this song for about two months, it already has thirty-eight iTunes plays, and that doesn't count the near five hundred CD plays it's had. Other than having an interesting name, Sufjuan (pronounced Su-fee-yawn) has an interesting style. It uses a lot of fabricated sounds, those being the ones that don't come from traditional instruments (look at me making up musical terms, and convincing myself the are true...I am so tried).
I have been staring at the lyrics for about twenty minutes, reading about what people think he actually says, and perusing the potential meanings of the song. Some say the actual volcano and some say it's about much, much more. It's about the "Fire of Fire." Fire, back in the day was one of the most powerful things and God is referred to as the Lord of Lords, so the fact that there might be a little more to the song that ash and lava isn't that silly. Especially since Sufjan is a fan of the Big Man. Even with the lyrics hashed out, it doesn't make a lot of sense. But there is a part that I can relate to.
There is a part in the song where he talks to himself in the third person, "Sufjuan follow the path...Sufjan follow your heart." There are two things that can be going on here. One is that he may be self motivating or two, it could be someone else talking to him. In one of the interpretations they think that Sufjan is struggling with "walking the straight and narrow." Living his life out as a Christian isn't going as smoothly as he'd hoped, and he's at a crossroads. To follow what he knows is right, or to follow what is easy. The reference of his name in the third person, could be the Holy Spirit motivating him to keep going. "You got it kid!" I think that may be it, because the lyrics go:
"In your breast
I carry the form
The heart of the Earth
And the weapons of warmth"
And that's where He is, in my h-e-a-r-t and that's who keeps me going. Maybe this song has been with me for a while so I can substitute Annie-Grace in for Sufjan.
"Vesuvius
Fire of Fire
Fall on me now
As I favor the Ghost"
Seven
I've decided against changing it. This is where I was last night. Here is a part that I did read and wanted to leave here:
"I will give to the Lord the thanks due to His rightness and justice, and I will sing praise to the name of the Lord Most High"
He loves us, even though we deserve the exact opposite. It's a free gift. Take advantage of it. Build a relationship with it. Stake your life on it.
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Postcards from Hell- The Wood Brothers
March 16, 2011
I did it! I went to Rydell, and now I want to learn even more! Earl Scruggs, The Kruger Brothers, and Abigail Washburn; just to name a few. The sound is so great, and there are so many different types of them. But the only downside is that they are pretty darn expensive. I just need a patron of the arts, I can pay them back in sweet, melodic tunes. Today was an all around good day a visit from an old friend, lots of walking, banjo talking, and braces in the works. And RUF was great tonight, God does so much in one day and this is just my little ole life.
Song: Postcards from Hell
Okie doke, so the title of the song might throw you off a little bit, considering that I'm all about Jesus, but I have to say that lyrically it's great. The chorus is just a repetition of "I've got a soul that I won't sell." The song is about a guy who is apparently really good at singing his blues, so much so he "sings like a choir girl" and he "uses the breeze as a telephone wire."This guy is so good that he uses the wind to sing to you! The man who the song is about can take you anywhere with his music, an alley, on a freight train, or to a church. But never sells out.
Two things about this song that I want to point out. One, is my interpretation of the verses. This guy can take you places and connect with you on incredible levels. He can sound as sweet as a choir girl or as fierce as to burn down a house. Isn't this what music is supposed to do? Move us? Take us to places that we would otherwise not have been able to journey (maybe that's why the band got its name). And my next question will lead me to point numero dos. Isn't that what a lot of popular music lacks? I am not begrudging anyone their musical preferences, but we all have to admit that there are different levels of success and of talent. Some view success on money and how recognizable something is, others see it as being completely happy. Talent is also subjective...and here I need to ask forgiveness for being mean to the person I was about to put in parentheses. But really, I think that once you put a price on something, it automatically cheapens it and it's not really yours anymore.
Let's take Bob (my hypothetical trendy musician guy), he loves playing the spoons. He's got a pretty solid following of people and he plays because he loves it. Simply put, it makes him happy. Bob doesn't make a lot of money playing the spoons, but he kind of enjoys smaller venues, especially the fact that he can play on his terms. Well, Bob gets heard by major music executives looking for cutlery players and sky rockets to the top of the charts, for the low low price of giving up all creative rights. Bob has a choice, he can keep playing the music he wants to play or he can play what the executives and "public" want. He also has to use hokey tactics and crazy antics to get people to listen, somewhere along the way he loses the joy for the spoons, and wonders why it didn't feel the same. OR he could keep playing cause he loves it and be broke. I am definitely not saying that playing music for money is bad, I guess it's about moderation. Life's defined by unseen motivations, maybe unseen even to the person making choices. Why do I do what I do? Do I repost cards from Hell?
Psalm Seis
I've said this a bunch today, to various people, David is super complainy. I am kind of getting to the point where I could be classified as mildly annoyed, and it's only the sixth Psalm! David is constantly asking to be paid attention to, for his enemies to be thwarted, for his kingdom to prosper, blah blah blah. Grow up and be a man, man! This was how I felt the majority of the day, especially after I read this last one. But then, I thought about it a little more (or could feel God softening my heart a little more) and started to not only sympathize for David, but also start to relate a little bit.
How much are my prayers to God really just "why me's" or "it's not fair that"? Am I really talking to Him, or am I just laundry listing all the things that are wrong, how many hardships I go through, how my life is so much less than someone who has x,y, and z? To be entirely honest, they aren't praises, they aren't even requests. Hello gift horse, I can't see you, I happen to be looking at a lot of teeth at the moment. Fortunately for me life does a good job at living out life isn't fair. Why fortunately? Cause if it was, I'd be a goner. He's a just God, but He is also graceful and merciful. And in the end of all the Psalms so far, He's always come through victorious. That's what He does, is win, no matter what.
I think what a lot of this is evidence for why we need a savior. I heard something today in RUF that hit home. We can waiver with our faith and still be 100% A O.K. Why? Weak faith in a strong Savior, saves you. The fact that David is even saying this to God is proof enough that even though David doesn't "see" God working, that he has small enough faith in a more than enough God (Luke 17: 6) to complain to Him about it.
This was kind of tangenty, but His love and affection never waiver. We may try to find other solutions, try and increase our faith, or just be upset with Him. God won't change the way He feels about us, and that is still a love worth dying for. So, thank you, God, for being as great as You are and making life not fair.
Postcards from Hell
I did it! I went to Rydell, and now I want to learn even more! Earl Scruggs, The Kruger Brothers, and Abigail Washburn; just to name a few. The sound is so great, and there are so many different types of them. But the only downside is that they are pretty darn expensive. I just need a patron of the arts, I can pay them back in sweet, melodic tunes. Today was an all around good day a visit from an old friend, lots of walking, banjo talking, and braces in the works. And RUF was great tonight, God does so much in one day and this is just my little ole life.
Song: Postcards from Hell
Okie doke, so the title of the song might throw you off a little bit, considering that I'm all about Jesus, but I have to say that lyrically it's great. The chorus is just a repetition of "I've got a soul that I won't sell." The song is about a guy who is apparently really good at singing his blues, so much so he "sings like a choir girl" and he "uses the breeze as a telephone wire."This guy is so good that he uses the wind to sing to you! The man who the song is about can take you anywhere with his music, an alley, on a freight train, or to a church. But never sells out.
Two things about this song that I want to point out. One, is my interpretation of the verses. This guy can take you places and connect with you on incredible levels. He can sound as sweet as a choir girl or as fierce as to burn down a house. Isn't this what music is supposed to do? Move us? Take us to places that we would otherwise not have been able to journey (maybe that's why the band got its name). And my next question will lead me to point numero dos. Isn't that what a lot of popular music lacks? I am not begrudging anyone their musical preferences, but we all have to admit that there are different levels of success and of talent. Some view success on money and how recognizable something is, others see it as being completely happy. Talent is also subjective...and here I need to ask forgiveness for being mean to the person I was about to put in parentheses. But really, I think that once you put a price on something, it automatically cheapens it and it's not really yours anymore.
Let's take Bob (my hypothetical trendy musician guy), he loves playing the spoons. He's got a pretty solid following of people and he plays because he loves it. Simply put, it makes him happy. Bob doesn't make a lot of money playing the spoons, but he kind of enjoys smaller venues, especially the fact that he can play on his terms. Well, Bob gets heard by major music executives looking for cutlery players and sky rockets to the top of the charts, for the low low price of giving up all creative rights. Bob has a choice, he can keep playing the music he wants to play or he can play what the executives and "public" want. He also has to use hokey tactics and crazy antics to get people to listen, somewhere along the way he loses the joy for the spoons, and wonders why it didn't feel the same. OR he could keep playing cause he loves it and be broke. I am definitely not saying that playing music for money is bad, I guess it's about moderation. Life's defined by unseen motivations, maybe unseen even to the person making choices. Why do I do what I do? Do I repost cards from Hell?
Psalm Seis
I've said this a bunch today, to various people, David is super complainy. I am kind of getting to the point where I could be classified as mildly annoyed, and it's only the sixth Psalm! David is constantly asking to be paid attention to, for his enemies to be thwarted, for his kingdom to prosper, blah blah blah. Grow up and be a man, man! This was how I felt the majority of the day, especially after I read this last one. But then, I thought about it a little more (or could feel God softening my heart a little more) and started to not only sympathize for David, but also start to relate a little bit.
How much are my prayers to God really just "why me's" or "it's not fair that"? Am I really talking to Him, or am I just laundry listing all the things that are wrong, how many hardships I go through, how my life is so much less than someone who has x,y, and z? To be entirely honest, they aren't praises, they aren't even requests. Hello gift horse, I can't see you, I happen to be looking at a lot of teeth at the moment. Fortunately for me life does a good job at living out life isn't fair. Why fortunately? Cause if it was, I'd be a goner. He's a just God, but He is also graceful and merciful. And in the end of all the Psalms so far, He's always come through victorious. That's what He does, is win, no matter what.
I think what a lot of this is evidence for why we need a savior. I heard something today in RUF that hit home. We can waiver with our faith and still be 100% A O.K. Why? Weak faith in a strong Savior, saves you. The fact that David is even saying this to God is proof enough that even though David doesn't "see" God working, that he has small enough faith in a more than enough God (Luke 17: 6) to complain to Him about it.
This was kind of tangenty, but His love and affection never waiver. We may try to find other solutions, try and increase our faith, or just be upset with Him. God won't change the way He feels about us, and that is still a love worth dying for. So, thank you, God, for being as great as You are and making life not fair.
Postcards from Hell
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